Survival Guide: When Mom Gets Sick
By Charlotte Bowman
Several years ago I broke my elbow in a painful ice skating accident. It was a complex fracture that required surgery to repair. For two weeks I lived in a cloud of painkillers. My husband took time off from work to care for me and our two boys. It was no picnic. He cleaned the house, shopped for groceries, kept the boys occupied, and chauffeured me to the hospital, doctor’s office, and physical therapy.
While at the beach this summer I injured my back. Talk about rotten luck! This time I was bedridden for three days while my family frolicked in the sand and surf. But it could have been worse. It could have happened while my husband was traveling.
Let’s face it. It’s tough on a family when mom gets sick. Doing laundry, caring for the kids, and keeping the house running are harder when you’re short a pair of hands. I’m lucky to have a husband and family members nearby to help out in a pinch. But I have girlfriends who are forced to survive as best they can.
Here are a few things that have helped me (and them) hang on:
Make it count when you’re up and about
If you’re able to get up and move about, set a timer for 5 minutes and do what you can. Conserve your energy and don’t expect perfection. Remind yourself that you can sweep up the dog hair the next time you’re up. If you’re on strict bed rest — no getting up at all (except to use the restroom, and even that only under accompaniment) — keep a two-way radio or baby monitor nearby. Both will help you communicate easily with people in other rooms. On the other hand… if your kids think the radios are a fun new toy, you might not get much rest!
Pick your priorities
Two weeks after my first baby was born, my Aunt offered to take me to lunch. I was still recovering from an emergency Caesarean Section and was eager to escape the house. But my grand plans were foiled by the reality of a newborn. When she arrived I was still in my PJs and tearfully scrubbing the dishes. She just smiled and asked me what was more important — the dishes or a shower? I chose the shower. So she played with the baby while I got ready. Thirty minutes later, we were out the door. Priorities, baby!
Create a Family Organizer
My parents volunteered to keep my toddler when my second baby was due. To make things easier for my mom, I created a Family Organizer and filled it with all the information she needed to run our home while I was in the hospital. I included important phone numbers like the pediatrician, pharmacy and plumber. I added my son’s routine, favorite recipes, daily reminders, and the locations of nearby playgrounds. My parents loved it. Thank you, FlyLady!
Ask for help
A week after baby #2 was born (and after my parents had left), my husband was recalled from leave. I was left to care for a toddler and a newborn while recovering from another Caesarean. Ack! So I sent out a request for help. Fortunately the teenage daughter of a church friend was willing to help. She stayed with me until I was well enough to manage on my own. If you don’t have family members or a trusted friend nearby, turn to your church or a compassionate neighbor. You might be surprised by who responds.
Let the kids entertain themselves
If your kids are older, send them outside or to their rooms to play “for just a few minutes.” If your kids are little, set up camp in the family room and supervise from the couch. Who cares if they build a fort using every pillow and blanket in the house? Who cares if your little ones watch the same movie on endless repeat? So long as they are fed, occupied and safely contained, you can rest and count down the minutes until bedtime.
Make it easy for the kids to help themselves
At times like this, it’s hard to be constantly available for your kids. This is a good opportunity to teach your kids to fend for themselves. Give them age-appropriate chores that will “help mommy fell better.” Move kid-friendly foods and drinks to a low shelf in the fridge. Put their favorite snacks within reach in the pantry. And make sure there are plenty of toilet paper rolls and wipes in the bathroom. Trust me on that last one!
Finally, pretend you’re Elsa and Let It Go!
The hardest part about being sick or injured is letting everything go for awhile. Just know that this too will eventually pass. How do you deal with being sick? Share your tips and advice in the comments below.
Photo Credit: istockphoto.com
